My older sister visited yesterday… After several weeks of ignorance, she decided to visit. Bearing in mind she left over a month, maybe two, ago she left home to go and live at some dump in the city centre. But she came yesterday claiming that she missed us, etc, and it seemed she only came to pick up some stuff she left behind. She did not stop to read the story I wrote, which I did ask her to, she "wowed" at the sketch I drew that I showed her before she continued to gather up some of the mess she left behind, she only seemed to be bothered about looking as if she was here for us while just coming with the sole intention of taking her stuff "home". Where is home when there is noone there to truely appreciate you?
I mostly look forward to her visits but this one has left me feeling a little more than depressed. Especially considering I accidently let it slip through these lips about my "self harming" business (I havn’t done it in about 2 weeks ^^) and didn’t seem bothered when I also let it slip that it was… kinda… because… she… left… But she was packing a bag full of some stuff she left behind at the time… I did truely feel like… going… back… to… "it"… But only stopped myself because of what I’m afraid might happen if I do… There is NO true justification for the scars I bear upon my wrist but at least they are not as deep as the internal scars I hide so well…
I wish I sometimes didn’t have all this to go through but it’s the hard times that make us who we are, seperate "man from boy" or "woman from girl", etc, but all in all… This Demoness Wont Run Any Longer