Despite the lack of device, I still hear music. Music that tries to drown out the voice(s) in my head. I’m not trying to grab anybody’s attention with this, I’m not being attention-seeking. I don’t let most of my “friends” know the URL for my blog. If anybody has given it out, especially to someone at school or someone I loathe, I will make their life a living hell. So, feel free to pass around my blog’s URL – at your own risk.
Presently, I feel like I’m suffocating. My chest is tight and I can’t breathe properly. I keep coughing, too. Shallow coughs. I can only assume that the coughing is a result of dust. It also doesn’t help that my nose is blocked because of this stupid cold.
The voices I’m hearing right now keep telling me I’m sociopathic. I can see why. I mean, my social skills fucking suck. But if having social skills means you can’t be honest and open about how you feel about things then I don’t want social skills.
Social skills are the lid to my bottle. The bottle is filling up and the lid has a hole in it. Pretty damn soon, it’ll overflow past that hole and the emotional liquid inside will drown my social skills and probably myself, too. We’ll see.
I need to talk about my problems but I just don’t feel like it. I do feel like consuming multiple tubs of ice cream. I don’t deny being a comfort eater.
My eczema is flaring up and my hands are all red. I’ve probably had an allergic reaction to the cleaning fluid at work today; however, that’s the least of my problems, it seems.
I won’t talk about my worst problem because the emotional fluid has already entered the bottle. Besides, it’d be rude because it’s a private issue to be resolved. Hopefully, sometime soon.
If there is no contact between my boyfriend and I for three days or more, I won’t assume that we’ve unofficially split up. That would also be considered to be rude, I guess. I’d contact him but I’m not sure what to say or how he’d react… Though I do admit that I was in the wrong and I also apologise. I doubt it makes much difference though… A little girl like me can’t make a difference in this world.