Tag Archive: people

I’m thoroughly sick of people telling me they “have people” that tell them things about me. The next person who says that, I will punch in the face. I’m sick of people talking about me when they don’t even talk to me! Besides, how is someone supposed to know that I’ve been spending a lot of time in the library when I haven’t seen or spoken to anyone I know?
Maybe I’m paranoid but either someone’s stalking me for information or something stupid or someone’s just keeping an eye out for me… I hate it when I get paranoid.


Trustworthy Deceit

We all stop and stare in your direction – why

are you acting this way? Tell me.

What’s going on? Is this another game? My

intuition tells me that I cannot see

what’s right in front of me.


An abstract noun that you do

not embody tells me that I should

leave. I’m wondering who

you’ll be today – could

it be me? Yes, you should.


Not long ago, I thought you

embodied it but you were there

to prove me wrong. Do

you want to tell me where

you got the idea that

I’d be okay with that?


Diminishing, as I

watch and try

to analyse.


Good Morning, World… Now Leave Me Alone

As you can see, I didn’t wake up in the best of moods today. I set an alarm on my DS to wake me up at 6am… I woke up at 6am, turned my DS off and contemplated getting up. I fell asleep. Then I woke up at 7:36am… So, with 24 minutes to get up and get ready… I got up… In a bad mood… I hate waking up late.
Despite the bad mood and 24 minutes to get up and get ready, I managed to get out of the house… Almost… On time. Though I found that my milk had been used up last night and nobody told me and my phone hadn’t been put on charge at all last night. Great. I have no hopes of listening to music in school today. I have to listen to people instead. Fuck my life.
So after all this, I began walking to school. I engaged in my usual routine of checking blogs, email and Facebook…
Facebook has been rather depressing for me lately because it only reinforces the notion that people don’t seem to tell me anything anymore. So do some blogs I read. It stands to reason that email couldn’t do that but it pisses me off because it seems that only half my emails get through.
I have normal lessons today, as opposed to the five hour art mock exam yesterday and the five hour drama mock exam tomorrow. It’s Children In Need day tomorrow. Non-uniform, too.
Yesterday also happened to be mum’s birthday. She was smiling a lot. It was great to see her like that. Grandad turned up too. He turned up just in time for cake (cakey senses?). The cake just happened to be an Aero Bubbles cake. And I just happen to have a fondness for Aero. Mix it with wine, and I’m set for the night. No, I’m not an alcoholic.
Luckily, it looks like I won’t be late for school.

In case any of you hadn’t actually noticed this yet, I actually tend to reflect a person’s attitude towards me back on themselves. Sometimes with a little restraint, admittedly. But reflected all the same. I’m not sure why I do this, but I always have done. Hence the reason why mine and my father’s personalities clash so much. Ahah. So if you think I’m treating you like shit horribly, then take a step back and see what the picture paints about the way you’re treating me.
This doesn’t go to say that I don’t have my own personality. It just means that different aspects of it will be revealed unto you depending upon how you treat me.


My mother was skipping through channels and came across a film. It seems to be a romance and, from what I perceive, the girl seems to be deaf… At first, I thought she was mute but it seems more like she’s just deaf and doesn’t speak.

It reminded me of something a friend once said to me… He had a thing for mute girls because he thought they were cute and wanted to help them… He was one of those guys that are overwhelmingly sweet in that he wanted so badly to help people and stuff like that… He said wanted to write a movie script about a mute girl in high school or something… He asked for my help and showed me what he’d written so far. I thought it was a good idea. He was quite sweet. I never did learn his real name… It’s probably a good thing because he turned out to be just another stalker/pervert/creep. I think I ended up blocking him on Facebook because he was getting in the way of my relationship at the time by telling me how much it wasn’t going to work. It didn’t work in the end though but that never gave him the right to critisize my choices.

Issues, Issues, Issues

I’ve come to realise that one of my biggest issues is that I don’t tell people some things. I mean, I always have a reason not to but… I bottle everything up inside myself. Oppa says that admitting it’s an issue is a huge step in the right direction. This time last year, I would’ve lied and said nothing was wrong and everything is okay but now I admit to there being a problem and say I don’t wanna talk about it. Is that so bad?

I’m a closed person at heart. I’ve been brought up to believe that people don’t need to know everything. I’ve always been hesitant to tell anyone anything in case it affected something, be it their image of me or someone else or their beliefs or whatever.

You can say anything about it that you like but, truth is, I am a weak person at heart. For whatever reason, I’ve grown up to be… Scared of people, I guess. I constantly say “I hate people” the way I’ll say “I hate spiders” because I’m anthropophobic as well as being arachnophobic. I’m also agoraphobic but that’s another story. Honestly, I could list my phobias. Ahah…

I’m trying to be more open with some people. I’m trying my best and I just wish people could see that.

Blame Yourself, Go On

People are always saying “Don’t blame yourself!” But who else is there to blame when it really is my fault? Maybe if I kept my mouth shut, I wouldn’t have anything to blame someone for. I could shoot myself for the words I speak sometimes. Who’s to blame but me?

Think About This One, Hmm?

If everyone, everywhere, every single person you knew were simply putting up a facade, what would you do? Even those closest to you – the ones who tell you “everything” – put on a facade. Every living person have or are hiding behind a mask of what you want to see in them or what they want you to see. There is absolutely no telling. So if you find yourself thinking “is this guy for real?” or “is that what she really thinks?” then the answer is this: we simply do not know. The moral of the story is to give your trust to no-one, right?


If your trust is given to no-one, you cannot love another person! Simple as that! So what do we do in this dark world of masks, pain and torment?

What do we do?